It's My Birthday...B!TCH

My Birthday was earlier this month, February 8th to be exact. On my birthday I went to work (-_-) but it wasn't that bad. My boss bought me a beautiful bouquet of flowers, some balloons and treated me to lunch! After work I headed down to Tequila Jacks in Long Beach to meet up with my friends and family for those good ole dollar tacos and three dollar margaritas. This was by far one of the best birthdays ever! My friends are the greatest and they made my day even more specialier (i know that's not a word)lol. I'm happy I'm getting older. I feel like I've grown alot in the past year or so.

Random thought

Why do people forget that others know their past? Don't fake the funk like you ain't never did hoe-ish. We know what you use to be. Please don't act like you never was ratchet...
This was cearly a SUPER random thought lol

A wound that will never heal

It’s been 7 years since my mother passed away. I was a freshman in college when my mom had a stroke and an aneurysm and died. She was in the hospital for three days. Every day but the third day, I got phone calls from everybody telling me how my mom was doing. The third day I heard nothing at all from my family until I called home and got the worst information ever. Me: “Hey grandma, how’s my mommy doing” My grandma: “Tamika, Your mother expired”. (Who the hell says expired o_O) I remember that shit like it was yesterday. My roommate and my friend from across the hall were in the dollar tree when I swear I almost passed out. I felt like I was in the twilight zone or something. I was in complete shock! My mommy died…what? Like, did God make a mistake and take the wrong mommy? It felt like a piece of me had died. Even though we weren’t close for various reasons she was still my mother…like you only get one. NOBODY can or will ever replace her.
I always have my super sad and depressed moment and I think it’s because the last conversation we had was really an argument and it was over money. I didn’t tell her I loved her or even say goodbye I just hung up in her face because she wasn’t going to send me any money till the next month (which was like the next week now that I think about it). I feel like I need closure which I will never get, so I just have to live with this pain for the rest of my life. I hate when I hear other people doing things or going places with their mothers. I just wish I could have had that bond with my mommy (kanye shrugs). I wish she could have been here to see me graduate from college, get married and have kids (whenever the hell that will be), but most of all I wish I can hug, kiss, tell her I love her and apologize. I know she will always be smiling down on me, and I know she super proud of me! I’ll never stop loving you mommy forever and a billion days!

1st African American Fire Chief in Los Angeles County 88 year history

When I saw this on the news last night I thought “WOW, the FIRST African American Fire chief EVER in the Los Angeles County Fire departments 88 year history. It’s about DAMN time”! Chief Deputy Daryl Osby 49, is a 27 year Veteran of the department. Today he was sworn in as the Ninth Chief of the Los Angeles County Fire Department.

copy paste link to see the Videohttp://www.nbclosangeles.com/station/as-seen-on/First_African-American_Fire_Chief_About_to_Start_New_Job_Los_Angeles-116405364.html

When will somebody put a RING ON IT???

So for the last year or so I have really wanted to settle down get married and have kids. It just seems like I can’t get a damn boyfriend. Last year I thought I found a potential boyfriend. He seemed like he was a good catch: cute, caring, he was in school and he had serious career goals. I thought he had his head on straight. He seemed perfect for me. Too bad he wasn’t BUT he was a liar who played childish games. Needless to say we no longer speak

-_- (womp womp)

I probably could have had a boyfriend with the perfect guy back in college, but like ALWAYS I mess things up….ALWAYS. See, I think I have issues with commitment. I’ll like a guy until he really starts liking me then I’ll just fall back. No phone calls no texts, no facebook messages, no NOTHING!!! It kinda funny cause it won’t be Until I see him on a random day and he’ll be like what’s up and I’ll just play stupid like what do you mean, “WHATS UP”? lol. Shady…I know, but I’m paying for it now. I think that’s why I’m low key bitter and lonely lol.

The one guy that I really fell for was ALMOST perfect. He was like my best friend. We really connected and I felt myself falling for him and I hated it. I like to be in control of my feelings but with him I completely lost all control. He was THEE sweetest guy in the world. He would come up to my job and talk to me for hours while I was working security at my school. We did couple things without the title. He was always there when I needed him. To sum it all up now that I think back he was the best. ONLY problem with him was that he was so damn secretive. I felt like I was dealing with the damn CIA. It’s weird because I knew a lot about him but I knew NOTHING at all about him. I just wish I could rewind back time and do things over cause I honestly feel like he was the one, but I guess I gotta look at it like this. If it’s meant to be he’ll make his way back in my life and we’ll see where it goes from there….

FYI: This is the ring that I want

Harry Winston Cushion Cut Diamond-3 carat (or larger ;-} ) VVS1 BOOM!!!!

For the 1st time

For the first time in my LIFE I'm actually feeling comfortable in the skin that I'm in. I've never been one of those girls who thought "I'm so pretty, or I'm the Sugar Honey Ice Tea" I always thought I was eh....iight, could look better...but I don't "/. Now as I get older I see that I am actually beautiful flaws and all. I still kinda have a big problem with my birthmark on the back of my neck...but I'm working through that tho. I always felt like I was the only person in the world with it. I still hate it, but It's clearly not going anywhere so I guess I need to just learn to love it. Nobody is perfect, everybody has some type of flaws. I just know one day God will send that special man who will love my flaws and all.

Sentimental Mood

Everytime I hear this it relaxes me...Changes my mood makes me happy! Its just something about it!
Hope it makes you feel the same way it makes me feel...ENJOY!

Happy Valentines Day

Happy Valentines Day everyone! I hope all of you who have significant others have an extra special day and those of you who don't Love yourself even more than you did the day before!

What's really the point of "VALENTINES DAY"? Today I was feeling kinda sad cause I didn't have anyone to celebrate Valentines day with, but I started thinking why do we need one day out of the year to glorify the person that we love? Why can't we express how we feel to them 24 hours a day 7 days a week and 365 days of a year? To me this is just a day for "the MAN" (lol) to make money off of everyone. I would honestly feel some type of way if the boo-thang gave me flowers today, like why are you being like everyone else? Do special things for me everyday not just today. I'm not saying everyday buy me something. Its the small things like write me a poem, put a post it on my car....something just don't go all out today cause "the MAN' made today the holiday of love.

Happy New Years 2011

Happy New Years to everyone!!!! Hope everyone had a fun and safe time last night

Bachelorette Party

On December 4 we took a party bus to Las Vegas for my cousins Bachelorette party. Omg that was THEE looooonnnnggggeeesssttt bus ride EVER...but we had so much fun!!!! non-stop bottle poppin and jello shots . Once we got to Vegas we went to dinner (as planned) at this Mexican restaurant. After dinner we were SUPPOSE to go to Tao ( mind you we put our name on the guest list days in advance and we spoke to a party promoter). When we got there they didn't want to let us in for free cause our party was too large (WTF). They said we had to get bottle service. What club has bottle service to accommodate a group of 25??? So after fighting with the bouncers we just left to come home. We ended up going to Vegas just to eat dinner but we had a blast until the damn bus driver started falling asleep at the wheel...we ended up getting home safe (Thank God) and I had a blast partying with my cousin on her last days as an unmarried woman.

It's been a minute

I've been MIA for a whole month because my damn computer broke....but I'm back now!!! yay